Mystery of the urinal deuce

VIRGINIA POLICE SEEK URINAL VANDAL
Who is this guy?
A) an extra from The Wire
B) Plaxico's new roommate
C) the guy - sorry, the suspect - who vandalized urinals in 7 different restaurants, then pretended to be a plumber so the restaurants would pay him to fix the urinals

If you answered C, then you obviously cheated and read about this story already. Shame on you. But double shame on Carlos O'Kelly's, the 1 restaurant that actually paid this dude between $250-$300 to fix the urinal HE broke in the first place.

Listen, I've taken plenty of pisses in urinals in my day. And if I had a dollar for every time I've been shitfaced in a crowded bar and puked in a urinal, I'd have at least 10 or 12 bucks by now. So, my question is, how the fuck can you vandalize something that people use to puke and piss in on a regular basis? Sounds a little like the legendary Mystery of the Urinal Deuce if you ask me.

Either way, you've got to really fuck up a urinal to be wanted by police. Maybe more urinals should look like these.

VERDICT:
more like carlos o'retards. or retard o'kelly's. whatever