Not dressed for success

MAN SAYS UNITED DENIED HIM FIRST CLASS SEAT DUE TO TRACK SUIT

A corporate executive with electronic retail giant Best Buy says a United Airlines gate agent denied him a seat in the first class cabin because he was wearing a track suit.

...Alvarez said the gate agent called his name and when he walked up to the counter for his upgrade, the agent said he was dressed too casually for first class.

"I was humiliated and embarrassed," Alvarez said.

Oh sorry, I didn't know when I went to the airport I had to get through security PLUS the fucking fashion police. Flying sucks dick as it is, and comfortable clothes are the key to not having to adjust your balls every 10 minutes for the next 4 hours. Your nuts and the fat bastard next to you will be thankful for it. Plus this guy is wearing Puma, which I'm pretty sure is the fucking Armani of track suits.

And how about goddamn United Airlines pulling this holier than thou shit? Really grinds my gears. If I were them, I'd spend a little less time worrying about what outfits people are wearing and a little more time on what to do about the man, the myth, the legend: Jet Blue. Because make no mistake about it, Jet Blue is freaking awesome. Get stoned, board your plane, eat a warm cookie, relax in your big leather chair, and watch some live TV. LIVE FUCKING TV!! Its air travel the way God intended it. And I'm sorry other airlines, but why you think an entire plane full of people would want to watch Miss Congeniality 2 or an edited version of fucking Van Helsing is beyond me. I'm just trying to hold my poop in until we land, and the least you could do is show me a movie that you didn't find on a cardboard shelf at 7-11.

VERDICT:
on the other hand, if you're flying first class, step up your game bro