7 Cups of Coffee

Some genius scientists tell us that drinking 7 cups of instant coffee a day "may leave you more likely to see, hear and smell things that aren’t there." This study is one of the first to connect caffeine with hallucinations, and apparently 7 cups of instant coffee in 1 day will do the trick. If I drank 7 cups of coffee in one day I would literally shit my organs into my pants, but according to this article, I wouldn't be able to see, hear or smell any of it.

If a tree falls in the forest, and nobody is around to hear it, does it make a sound? And if I am hallucinating about not shitting my pants, but in reality am shitting my pants, am I really shitting my pants?

VERDICT:
only retarded if you actually shit yourself and legitimately don't notice